Tempi duri per i vampiri

Happy Birthday!

2009-03-08T15:15:12Z

Just popping in to say Happy Birthday to me! This has been the most amazing year out of the past 10. It is almost like I have ceased to exist, that I've finally found that thin line between this world and the other, and can walk seamlessly betwix them... or stay in the calm quiet moment at their point of intersection. I move like a ghost, barely moving the feathers of a dove. No one hears me, yet they seem to know someone is passing them, almost invisible. And I bask in the moment, being present and unengaged.

Best wishes to you all.

friendship killed

2009-02-02T01:37:35Z

sorry to hear that
guess you can regret, learn and move on
or beat yourself over it
since it seems to be about you, not her,
you have the power and the choice to
do it differently next time.
you'll honor the past by
not repeating it in the future.

not much for the new year

2009-01-05T21:50:43Z

So much to do, and so much to say, I might
intone, as I've been away. But
when you've been so far afield not
much the memory can yield except
to lurch and grind to a halt. It's just
my brain. It's not my fault. I've run
wild and fast and free, and scarce
remember who is me. Though here
I sit, both full and empty, and wonder
what this year will bring, full of hurt
or joys a plenty; will I cry or will I sing?

Sunflowers in the Fall

2008-11-09T18:14:33Z

Sunflowers in the Fall
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

I just finally got around to taking some pictures of this, and it came out nicely. Aleja helped me choose it.

I am. We are. Will become

2008-09-29T11:20:53Z

I think 

we construct our identity 
socially, and for to not 
construct identity is 
to have none. 

Rather than 'choosing' 
anything, we merely 
find out what we are and 
what we have become and
what has been created. 

Created by our actions, 
by our biology, 
by the world in which we 
have been given and 
influence meaning. 

In a different world, 
what we construct and 
what we are would have 
different meaning, 
and does, in the many 
worlds of this planet. 

There is only language 
with which we construct 
meaning. Language of all our 
social interactions... and 
from all this, 
we may find 
ourselves.

[in response to http://community.livejournal.com/abstractthought/754454.html]

yarrrr

2008-09-29T03:58:49Z

I'm only 5'1"... I won't grow any more!

hey? wassap?

2008-07-17T11:50:55Z

It makes me wonder where I've been, and where you've been since then,
as I've writ not a word nor read not a wit, which is really quite absurd.
I've been crawling around the holes, and alleys and lanes
of the warrens I'm wont to call life, and I've had my share
of blessings and sins, of love and moments of strife.
If feels that I've lost the words in my mouth, locked deep in side of my soul
except for these moments just after dawn when I smile and see the world whole.

too stupid to care...

2008-06-23T11:38:32Z

peccatrix

2008-05-26T06:36:53Z

sinful thoughts and sinful wishes play upon my lips and tongue
while I watch the sinful missives play upon my pen and paper
sinful thoughts of deep delight are memories I warmly cherish
language moments of slight respite from Monday morning's dishes
night time crawls on bended knee in search of favors dark
yes sunlight shows for all to see the marks of my good night

heartbreaker

2008-05-22T18:45:51Z

heartbreaker
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

El Capitano!

2008-05-20T19:34:41Z

El Capitano!
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

Shopper

2008-05-20T08:00:06Z

Shopper
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

I wish I could have asked him who he was waiting for.

WTF

2008-05-19T18:04:56Z

WTF
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

Did I really sleep with you?

that was fun!

2008-05-19T13:30:33Z

I scarfed CT's Nikon for the day and tore around Aix with the peeps, being a bit touristy, and getting some great shots like I've not gotten in ages. But I'm zausted. I don't do enough of that full contact sunlight and walking in in the day and I need a cat nap.

Solar powered bra?

2008-05-16T12:17:42Z

Solar powered bra is what they're talking about in japan.

Why?

celtic music...

2008-05-16T11:47:46Z

I like song like "I named my boat after my true love and she sunk"

Aleja in draft

2008-05-15T19:54:36Z

Aleja in draft
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

My draft of a painting of aleja (aleja) that I'm working on. She looks wonderful,and will be moreso when I get it right.

peeps in provence

2008-05-14T11:40:49Z

been hanging off and on with complicittheory, pandamin and blooferlady, and soon some grand-peeps. La Bloofee has a good post of the yesterday, which I luckily largely slept through. Been there, done that, got caught in the traffic jam, but they wouldn't listen. it is great to drag people through old haunts.

vulcan in repose

2008-05-13T18:55:52Z

vulcan in repose
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

This is a shot of a work in progress.

a rare shot of me.

2008-05-12T08:12:56Z

a rare shot of me.
Originally uploaded by sarahsmiles.

The closest anyone's going to get.

and yes, the poems

2008-05-02T20:48:28Z

I've decided to fuck the poems and my pen.
Which means that now that I've made this decision, I'll suddenly be verbose.
It goes that way.

Bookish or mousy...

2008-05-02T20:45:36Z

Soon enough I'll be stomping around the countryside with some peeps. And it will be good. Feels like I haven't been still in ages, in one place, breathing one big stretch of air. Of course I'll get sick of it soon enough, but for now I can pretend it's all I've ever wanted.

I was in a bookstore in, a small one, old, that looks and smells and feels like it knows about books, or wants you to think so. The kind that hides in anything pretending to be a bigger town. So you figure they know what you want when you ask for books on roma/gypsies, and old travel literature. Instead I got an almost blank stare, and pointed to a section to fend for myself. Maybe that's part of the charm of the place. Like the fancy restaurants people go to because they want the waiter to be an asshole. I wasn't interested enough to hunt things down in the end.

The mouse was much more interesting. Little brown guy peeking through holes in the floor, minding his own business. Didn't know he was going to become part of my city mouse/country mouse/Stuart Little fantasy. I saw him in his little holes, with his mouse family running his mouse-errands around the store, and then maybe he's on holiday in Aix... I may have to go back ad ask him his name, just in case I meet his cousin or something.

'omeward bound

2008-05-02T18:20:55Z

I'm tired of being the night bitch.
I really am. I don't mind lazing about
all the time, but when I miss the day
for weeks on end, I realize how far
out of the loop I've fallen.
And I'm getting tired of it.

Hanging in NYC for the past
couple weeks has really reminded
me of that. Ah well, home soon.
It will be a social month
with peeps, family and droogies.

I'm not real. What about you?

2008-04-29T00:47:44Z

What better mentor for a 10-year-old than Charles Manson? Little Billy seeks life advice, and America's most notorious killers are happy to oblige

people believe anything! Just cause you're a killer and you get email from a child don't mean it is real!

At the border poem 31

2008-04-01T00:22:19Z

At the border, on the waterfront, on the beach,
a calm salt surf kisses our slippers
of brocade and gold thread slightly
damp from the cool moist sand.
We stand together, three of us, looking
out across the water towards a far
shore that is without more than
an image in our memories of two,
and a storied fantasy for the third
sister, conceived at home but born
after our journey had begun.
We hold her between us,
our youngest, our sweetness,
our treasured hope and worry.
The sisters, we three,
muse to our own survival, stalk
these shores in the evening
and again in the hours before dawn,
searching in those magic moments
for a way across to take our child home.